Real worlds?

Back to the "real world" this week and hasn't exactly been easy. I don't know why I have that distinction in my head. I found myself talking to people about "in my real life" or thinking "when I get back to reality". My brain tends to try and separate my daily life, responsibilities and routine from the time I am able to spend in Costa Rica. Maybe it's just because it's different. I'm not driving and running errands and playing chauffeur and answering pages and filling out billing sheets and making dinner and .....the list is never ending. I run from first thing in the morning to the final minute I finally get to lay down and relax. That's the way it goes for most of us I think. Most days feel like a version of what I imagine an air force mission is like---parachutes? Now GO! GO! GO! GO! That definitely is an aspect of the differentiation. But maybe it's also because I choose to emotionally separate it. When I'm in Costa Rica I am more myself than anywhere else-no pretenses, no parameters. Back home, I tend to hold back. I'm not emotionally invested in every second and every patient. I'm more clinical, more structured, thinking about following guidelines and fitting into the mold. It's necessary. It's easier. But why? Costa Rica is just as much the real world. They are real people. Real obstacles. Real feelings. How do I integrate the compassion and joy I find there into HERE? I don't have the answer....I'm working on it. I'm working to find and share my passion with the patients that need it here, to share with my friends/colleagues the opportunities and experiences that are out there, and to help my kids understand their unique blessings and passion. It's not the easy road but I'm realizing it IS the necessary one. Its what God has asked of me and I can't ignore it anymore. "We are all faced with a series of great opportunities brilliantly disguised as impossible situations." --Charles Swindoll